View Single Post
Old 06-17-2008, 06:05 PM   #3 (permalink)
Deejo
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 105
Default Re: Is it me or her?

Quote:
Originally Posted by sundevil View Post
however, we don't have time for each other.
That always strikes me as the cruelest irony in a struggling marriage.

You meet this person with whom all you want to do is spend time. Get to know. Share your heart. Just be with.

Then as the ultimate expression of that love and commitment to being with your partner, you marry them.

And then it all changes. Add children, careers, daily schedules and responsibilities. You get lost in the job of being married instead of the purpose of being married.

There isn't enough here to determine if it's you or her. Frankly it doesn't much matter. What matters is making it clear to yourself, and your wife, what you want from your marriage - and she should do the same. Then you work together at making it happen.

As for her reminiscing about the 'glory days', I'd let it go. I go camping with friends that I have known for 3 decades - we always revisit the past, including partners that were, and partners we wished there were. I don't see it as harmful - although I see nothing wrong with asking her and her friend to talk about their past boy-toys when you are out of earshot.
Deejo is offline   Reply With Quote