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stumped · 06-18-2008, 10:27 AM

Ok I am 30 years old my husband is soon to be 37. We have been married for almost 7 years together for 9 1/2.

Over the years my weight has fluctuated and in the last 3-4 months was at its highest. I have gained 95lbs since the day we got married. I have gone on diets again and again lose some weight only to slowly put it back on. My husband has made comments encouraging, mean, nasty etc. over the years and has even said things about my weight and I guess quite honestly I never took them too seriously or we would just fight about it because I thought he was being mean.

About 2-3 months ago he told me that I had lost my confidence...that I dont care about what I look like anymore, my weight is an issue, I dont do anything with my hair anymore and all I wear is jeans and t-shirts. I completely agreed with him.....I told him he was absolutley right and that I wasnt happy with myself and I needed to change that. So I started slowly by doing my hair and putting on a little makeup (never wore much to begin with). I work in an environment that dressing up in inappropriate so I wear jeans, t-shirts and sneakers everyday. Then I started eating better and exercising since this began I have lost 30.5lbs. Well 3 weeks ago he hit me with the he didnt want to be married anymore.....and just kept saying he is unhappy.

After some time he has finally admitted that my weight is a big problem for him. My husband is a very good looking man and he said he didnt want to tell me because he thought it sounded superficial but he couldnt help how he felt.

He moved out of the bedroom 2 weeks ago and suggested that one of us needs to move out. I am afraid that no matter what I do I have already lost him. My friends that I have talked to have differing opinions. I know I am on the right track but I know in the back of his mind he is also thinking about how long will it last this time....is there anything I can do that might convince him otherwise? I know that I let this happen because I didnt take his comments seriously any advice would be helpful.

A couple of my friends are adamant that he doesnt want a divorce because he is still wearing his ring and he hasnt moved out of the house....

06-18-2008, 10:27 AM	#1 (permalink)
stumped Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 150	Weight ruining marriage Ok I am 30 years old my husband is soon to be 37. We have been married for almost 7 years together for 9 1/2. Over the years my weight has fluctuated and in the last 3-4 months was at its highest. I have gained 95lbs since the day we got married. I have gone on diets again and again lose some weight only to slowly put it back on. My husband has made comments encouraging, mean, nasty etc. over the years and has even said things about my weight and I guess quite honestly I never took them too seriously or we would just fight about it because I thought he was being mean. About 2-3 months ago he told me that I had lost my confidence...that I dont care about what I look like anymore, my weight is an issue, I dont do anything with my hair anymore and all I wear is jeans and t-shirts. I completely agreed with him.....I told him he was absolutley right and that I wasnt happy with myself and I needed to change that. So I started slowly by doing my hair and putting on a little makeup (never wore much to begin with). I work in an environment that dressing up in inappropriate so I wear jeans, t-shirts and sneakers everyday. Then I started eating better and exercising since this began I have lost 30.5lbs. Well 3 weeks ago he hit me with the he didnt want to be married anymore.....and just kept saying he is unhappy. After some time he has finally admitted that my weight is a big problem for him. My husband is a very good looking man and he said he didnt want to tell me because he thought it sounded superficial but he couldnt help how he felt. He moved out of the bedroom 2 weeks ago and suggested that one of us needs to move out. I am afraid that no matter what I do I have already lost him. My friends that I have talked to have differing opinions. I know I am on the right track but I know in the back of his mind he is also thinking about how long will it last this time....is there anything I can do that might convince him otherwise? I know that I let this happen because I didnt take his comments seriously any advice would be helpful. A couple of my friends are adamant that he doesnt want a divorce because he is still wearing his ring and he hasnt moved out of the house....