Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

cao428 · 11-04-2009, 11:47 PM

Our problems have been going on forever it seems. My hub just doesn't trust me and it hurts. He never has and never will. He is the child of an alcoholic mother, so right there I was at a disadvantage. He just doesn't trust women in general and is insecure about them.

He travels extensively and we have a rental property business which is not doing well because he travels so much. I do what I can with it, but I work full time 40 hours, and commute 6-10 hours a week, plus tend to our older children's needs, take care of the home, etc.

Tonight I got accused of adding my name on to a bank account of which my name has always been on for the properties, and for messing up his online access to that account because I added myself on. I have to pay the bills and manage this account while he travels for work 30-45 days or more at a time. He will not go to counseling. My life is already so overwhelming because of his traveling and me being stuck with everything managing the properties too. I am thinking I need to get out because it's dragging me down to the pits of depression.I am a very happy person by nature and loving to him...but after 23 years of this I am getting weary, and not like myself anymore.

I just hired a bookkeeper to get things under control. I just have a hard time with being told he doesn't trust me...after all I do for him, the family and the business.

Is there any hope for us? (this has been going on for 23 years)

11-04-2009, 11:47 PM	#1 (permalink)
cao428 Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: North East USA Posts: 194	trust and finances Our problems have been going on forever it seems. My hub just doesn't trust me and it hurts. He never has and never will. He is the child of an alcoholic mother, so right there I was at a disadvantage. He just doesn't trust women in general and is insecure about them. He travels extensively and we have a rental property business which is not doing well because he travels so much. I do what I can with it, but I work full time 40 hours, and commute 6-10 hours a week, plus tend to our older children's needs, take care of the home, etc. Tonight I got accused of adding my name on to a bank account of which my name has always been on for the properties, and for messing up his online access to that account because I added myself on. I have to pay the bills and manage this account while he travels for work 30-45 days or more at a time. He will not go to counseling. My life is already so overwhelming because of his traveling and me being stuck with everything managing the properties too. I am thinking I need to get out because it's dragging me down to the pits of depression.I am a very happy person by nature and loving to him...but after 23 years of this I am getting weary, and not like myself anymore. I just hired a bookkeeper to get things under control. I just have a hard time with being told he doesn't trust me...after all I do for him, the family and the business. Is there any hope for us? (this has been going on for 23 years)