cody5

It sounds like you're having trouble getting over it because he hasn't come clean yet. You mentioned that you don't even know if it was someone at work or not. You need closure and he's not giving it to you. You need to heal and he's making you go through this alone and that sucks.

My problem I've written about earlier on this forum happened a little longer ago than I made out in my threads. I was too embarrassed to admit that I haven't been able to get over it yet. My wife won't come clean with me either. Continues to lie. Not only that, but the official story is that I made her stop her innocent activities due to my immaturity. I'M the bad guy.

I can't even look at my wife lately because she's making me suffer through this alone just so she doesn't have to admit that she acted inappropriately. She know's what I'm going through (I've tried comunicating about it again recently, hence my activity on this forum) and she's making me suffer alone. I'm very close to an ultimatum: either talk to me, no lies, "or else". I think she knows the "or else" won't be too bad (her activities weren't divorce worthy and there are kids involved), so she's sticking to her story. But I also have a great marriage, and that will suffer greatly unless she helps me heal. She has to man-up, take some blame and help her family. Sounds like your husband needs to do the same.

Or maybe not. I'm not the brightest bulb on this forum.