Originally Posted by chasing_rainbows
i was also thinking about just asking him "would you like an honest and trusting marriage?"... that's all, as a way to express that I don't think we have one
If you would like an open and trusting marriage then why not be open and honest and tell him you don't think you have one rather than asking leading questions and hoping to sort of segue into the desired topic?
A marriage is a financial contract, nothing more. If you're married and there are monies being hidden, then that contract has been officially broken and it's a problem that needs to be dealt with.
How to deal with that problem may vary, could be divorce, hiding your own money, doing some detective work to expose any and all financial and other deceptions, but whatever you do, don't just sit there and accept it as a fact of life.