Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

nice777guy · 11-30-2009, 01:35 PM

Wife and I are starting a trial separation this week. I feel like I need to reach out and speak with someone, but I’m not sure I can talk right now without “losing it.”

Ever feel this way?

She continues to claim that this is only temporary, but I’m just not sure that she will make the changes she needs to make for our marriage to work.

I can think of two times in the last 6 months when I “said” something I really regretted later. But, I think overall I’ve shown an incredible amount of patience and integrity while continuing to take care of our house and children, and fight for our marriage, while she has continually lied to me about her “friend.”

My fear is that if I become the man I really want to be, and work on the things I need to work on, then I won’t want her to come back unless she is ready to commit all she has to making our marriage and family work the way they should.

My primary issues – I think – are with low self-esteem and lacking a network of friends to help me deal with issues like THIS one. There are people I could reach out to, but this has been so painful (and embarrassing) that I’ve mostly just kept it to myself.

Stuck here at work today – dying to be heard – but not wanting to let anyone inside.

As unrealistic as it may be, I really wish I had my wife back.

11-30-2009, 01:35 PM	#1 (permalink)
nice777guy Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 474	Lonely Wife and I are starting a trial separation this week. I feel like I need to reach out and speak with someone, but I’m not sure I can talk right now without “losing it.” Ever feel this way? She continues to claim that this is only temporary, but I’m just not sure that she will make the changes she needs to make for our marriage to work. I can think of two times in the last 6 months when I “said” something I really regretted later. But, I think overall I’ve shown an incredible amount of patience and integrity while continuing to take care of our house and children, and fight for our marriage, while she has continually lied to me about her “friend.” My fear is that if I become the man I really want to be, and work on the things I need to work on, then I won’t want her to come back unless she is ready to commit all she has to making our marriage and family work the way they should. My primary issues – I think – are with low self-esteem and lacking a network of friends to help me deal with issues like THIS one. There are people I could reach out to, but this has been so painful (and embarrassing) that I’ve mostly just kept it to myself. Stuck here at work today – dying to be heard – but not wanting to let anyone inside. As unrealistic as it may be, I really wish I had my wife back.