Just an update. I have started to back off of my demands that she stop talking to him and as a result we have been getting along better (go figure). She is more affectionate however it feels forced. I have been making it clear lately that I am on the verge of seeing a lawyer and she is deathly afraid that I will "screw her". Even though she calls my bluff (not really a bluff but I haven't followed through yet) by acting like it doesn't bother her, I'm sure she is trying to keep me content enough until she can figure out what she wants to do.
I am making a prediction right now. She has been making comments all week that her sister has been bugging her to visit. So far she tells me she has said no but I know my wife too well and can see I'm being set up. You see her sister lives in the same state as the OM and while he would still have to hop a quick flight to get there, it's a lot closer than the 2000 miles between them now. She knows I will not be happy so she is doing her best to make it look like she has no choice. The funny thing is I just may let her go without saying anything because I feel this may be the only chance we have. That she spends some time away from me which she never likes, and some real time with him so hopefully she can see he's not all she's built him up to be in her mind. The hardest part about it however is that I know that they would consummate the affair if they didn't already when they met, but I may not have a choice
Great options huh?