Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

peacefully · 11-30-2009, 09:59 PM

Only you can decide if this is a good idea. Do you discuss reconciling with her, or will this be a new conversation?
If it is a new conversation, is it one you are ready to have?

You say you are getting along, have you always gotten along during the separation, or have you evolved to this place? Would this conversation hurt the place you are now if it goes sideways?

(I know with my ExH, when we have gotten along, I get my hopes up and then start thinking of the good times in the past. I don't think about the bad times until something reminds me, or he inevitably does something hurtful and then I have to work myself back up to feeling halfway okay all over again. but that is my situation).

From this note I would read that you do not want to divorce and she does. Is that correct?

I have read through your story a bit and you've mentioned how your previous attempt at reconciling almost destroyed you. Are you willing to put aside your needs and feelings?

I know that the holidays are very hard for me. Thanksgiving last week was very painful. I try to not think of Christmas...
Would the holidays be influencing you?

I don't have advice whether this is right or wrong, but it might be a good time to ask yourself some of these questions.

11-30-2009, 09:59 PM	#2 (permalink)
peacefully Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 43	Re: Is this a bad idea? Only you can decide if this is a good idea. Do you discuss reconciling with her, or will this be a new conversation? If it is a new conversation, is it one you are ready to have? You say you are getting along, have you always gotten along during the separation, or have you evolved to this place? Would this conversation hurt the place you are now if it goes sideways? (I know with my ExH, when we have gotten along, I get my hopes up and then start thinking of the good times in the past. I don't think about the bad times until something reminds me, or he inevitably does something hurtful and then I have to work myself back up to feeling halfway okay all over again. but that is my situation). From this note I would read that you do not want to divorce and she does. Is that correct? I have read through your story a bit and you've mentioned how your previous attempt at reconciling almost destroyed you. Are you willing to put aside your needs and feelings? I know that the holidays are very hard for me. Thanksgiving last week was very painful. I try to not think of Christmas... Would the holidays be influencing you? I don't have advice whether this is right or wrong, but it might be a good time to ask yourself some of these questions.