BlueCreek

I'm going add my voice to the ones above. Of course you are probably feeling jealous, but the person who can make the difference is you. It hurts to have her wanting to spend so much time with someone else and having so much fun with another man, regardless of whether or not you know she won't cheat on you. What everyone else has said is bang on though, you need to make it so that the person she has fun with is you, the person she wants to take walks with, go have ice cream with, and laugh with, is you. She is telling you she doesn't have fun at home or with you. In other words, she is telling you plain as day what she needs you to do to make a change and improve your marriage. The possibilities are endless for what you can do to spend quality time with her and there is no road map other than your own heart, commitment, and knowledge of what she enjoys.

Of course staying out to 3 or 4 is out of the question, that is completely rude and disrespectful. But instead of putting your foot down and saying "You can't do this." Find out why going out until late is so fun for her, and if hanging out late with her friends is fun, tell her you are willing to get a babysitter so that the two of you can do things late together, or if she is wants to hang out with her friends once or twice a week, go with her and do it together.

You may trust her, but that doesn't mean there aren't a couple guys around her that might not have it in mind to hedge in. And if they're out at a bar or wherever until late at night, just don't trust them, even if you trust your wife. Right now there is effectively another man dating you wife, wooing her, and regardless of how faithful you know she is, there is another man that is fulfilling her emotional needs right now, and it is not you.

That said I wouldn't make any demands that she stops talking with this other guy, just start giving her things to do with her time that involve you instead. Over time, as you fulfill more and more of the emotional needs, her desire to spend time with her work buddies should fade. Now if they don't, if she keeps staying out until late or night, or you're having ice cream together and he calls her and she talks half the time with him, then you need to have a serious conversation about the limits of your emotional needs, but your first step is to date her and help her remember all those times you had and things you did together that made her fall in love with you and marry you.

Talk with her, tell you you understand that she is not having fun at home or with you, and tell her you are committed to changing that. Let her know that while you think it is good she has friends, it is deeply hurting you that she is able to find so much more joy and emotional support with other people, when it is critical to you that you are her best friend, that you are the one that wants to make her happy and have fun with, and let her know all the things you want to do with her and ask her what things she wants to do. Figure it out now, today, and start dating your wife again immediately.