kajira

I wish I knew where to begin. My husband and I have been married for 18 years as of last Saturday. The weekend prior, I found online by accident where he had filed for divorce. I confronted him, stating I thought with our anniversary coming up it might be a fresh start and showed him what I had found. He says he filed to protect himself from getting shafted, due to the fact, things haven't been good for a very long time. He indicated he hasn't had me served because he still wants to try to work it out. However, the day before our anniversary it was confirmed he had an affair from 2002 to Feb. of this year. I know I haven't been the easiest person to live with, however, either has he. We have been more respectful to one another the past few days than we have in years, yet how can I trust him? I have moved into the guest bedroom because I can't sleep in the same bed with him. He keeps asking if we are going to work this out, and my reply is I don't know, because I trully don't. If I stay, I feel like I am settling, eventhough I do love him, I don't know if I am in love with him. If I go, am I making the biggest mistake of my life....I am so confused. We started counseling the day before I found out about the affair and are supposed to go again on Monday....help!