JTL

Thank you for the replies. I have been doing everything that's been suggested. I started writing her letters about a month ago. She told me she appreciated them. Even though this is happening, i feel that it will not work. The last 2 days have been bad. She is again depressed and withdrawn. Nothing i do seems to make a difference. I have shattered her belief in me. She refers to our relationship as 18 years of lies. It hasn't been but i understand why she feels this way. I awoke to her last night crying and tried to talk to her. She told me she was convinced that i have cheated or had an affair. I have not and i became angry and raised my voice. She immediately shut me down and told me it was over. She has said this before, so i'm not sure if it's real or not. We have been going through this for 3 months now. I have been to a councellor and we had 2 sessions together. She does not seem interested in going back. I, however, will be going back regardless of what happens. Like most men, i'm terribly impatient. I have tried to be patient during this process but it has been difficult. If we can work this out, how much time should/will it take? At what point does one say "We tried and now it's time to move on"? I don't want this, but the thought of both of us living unhappily for the next year is scary. Besides each other, we have our kids to think about and they need happy parents. My wife is not the same mother when she is depressed. I am not the same father when we are going through turmoil. I was really hoping for the best here, but am now fearing the worst.