gold907

Where do I start? I have been with my husband the past 10 years. When I met him my children were 2 and 4 from my previous marriage. So basically my husband has been their father as their biological father rarely sees them,maybe once or twice a year. In the last 2-3 years my husband and daughter have has a strained and tense relationship because of her actions and his attitude. In the latest string of events in the past few months, my daughter was caught shoplifting and I later found out she was taking the blame for her friend she was with, she has left the house at 3am in the morning and walked 6 miles to go fight another girl, she has left her great grandmother's house in the middle of the night, and finally her and my son allowed their friends to take our car on a joyride and damaged our truck in which my daughter went out with her friends in the truck. We have filed a police report and I have been on the phone all day trying to find a family counselor. Needless to say, my husband and I were furious and he screamed yelled and cussed them out for letting this happen when no one should have been in the house at all while we were out. Also it should be noted that my husband and I rarely ever go out alone because we also have a 1 1/2 year old and we always usually do things the whole family can do together. So this all happens the second time this year we have gotten to go somewhere alone. He has left for a few days because he cannot stand to be around the kids and flat out told them, he does not consider them his kids anymore and he does not care about them either and they are grounded until they are 18. Which is 6 years for my son and 4 years for my daughter. I feel both children need to be punished beyond our domain which is why we filed the police report but it may never go to court. However, I did call my daughter's probation officer to tell about the incident so now her shoplifting incident will not be removed from her record since she has breached her contract. I do not want to send my daughter away, she needs to pay for the consequences and my son also for being involved. Their biological father cannot take care of them, he can barely take care of himself and he does drugs so I do not feel it would be to their benefit to go there but I ask you, would this be the better choice for my marriage or do you think the counseling will help all involved. Personally, I feel my husband is sometimes too harsh with the older kids but he feels I am at fault for leaving them alone. Does anyone have any good advise?