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Old 07-14-2008, 12:53 PM   #2 (permalink)
draconis
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: North East
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Default Re: Marriage and Physically Handicapped

I suffer from MD. During the onset I fell into a mild depression for what felt like no one understood me. I reasoned no one had empathy towards me.

It was hard knowing I use to be Joe-handy-man to Johnny-armchair-quarterback. I knew how to fix about everything but had to walk people through the situations.

During that time my sex life changed too. Although I could "perform" often it was painful or would get painful and I moved to end quicker then I normally would or even want too. I never said why. Ofcourse I had to alter how I had sex with the wife, to a lot more foreplay (30-45 minutes) about double the amount before to cover for the other things that were lacking.

I often was so overwhelmed by my situation I felt bad then feeling bad made me worse. To boot, I had all kinds of people say really mean things to me about being less than a man, a liar, a leech. I had sold everything I had to try to support myself and family and started my own business. It wasn't easy and was very stressful.

I too never wanted the drugs. I am on so much medication if I took it all I'd sleep through the day even if I was awake because the MD is that painful. For the most part I take as little as I can to just make it through. Therapy has been a two edged sword. The harder I work to keep myself from being wheelchair bound the more I get confronted by people asking rather demanding to know why I walk with a cain.

Communication maybe the best thing for you both. Further I think a good psychologist would help him work through his issues, I used one to understand myself and where I was.

Best wishes, I will pray for you both.

draconis
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