Quote:
Originally Posted by draconis
You need to keep yourself in check so far as not to do anything stupid. You have come a long way at improving yourself, now you need to heal yourself. Sometimes that might mean moving on or setting a limit of time to decide what is the best course of action. The fact he wants to seperate for a time is a red flag to me. A marriage is when two people work together, with each other, not against each other.
draconis
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You are absolutely right, I need to keep it in check. My kids keep me grounded, I think about them. I am confused, does he want a separation or time alone? He said, "I wish I had some place to go for just a week to think about how to fix me". Is that a separation? I think two people can't work on their marriage if they are apart so for me that will be the signal for the end and to just start rebuilding my life. A time limit is a great idea.....This Saturday is my birthday, I have no desire to celebrate and would like to let the day slip by. Last month I made a huge deal out of his. Before this I'd planned date night on Saturday (thinking why doesn't he do this since its my birthday but I kept it in check). In one of our conversations I brought that up. Anyway, now he says let's go out Saturday night and have a good time. Time off? Go out and have a good time together? I am so confused. My parents will actually be out of town, they have a pool and I am debating about saying no to Saturday night, cancelling the sitter he booked, and taking the kids swimming all day and staying the night there without him. I'm not trying to be vindictive but maybe its right to give him space and I really don't want anyone taking me out out of obligation, that would be the worst...very confused.