swedish

Welcome to the forum, redsnake.

My thoughts on what your wife has said in the past “Honey if you ever feel the need to leave this marriage for any reason, just come talk to me” is that she is encouraging you to respect her enough in the marriage to bring any concerns to her first so you can discuss them openly before making any hard and fast decisions that would affect your entire family. I have said the same to my husband, and can tell you I would still be devastated if he came to me and said he wanted out unless I happened to be having the same feelings.

I can understand your desire to "get out, travel, take risks that one would not take with a dependent" as I have 3 teens myself and I do look forward to being able to do these things as well. I think it's only natural that empty-nesters explore new things. I just can't imagine doing them without my husband. That's the part where I wonder if the exploring other relationships comes more into play and how much does that play a part in your desire to leave? I actually think my life with my husband will have some new excitement when we are free to do as we please. Have the two of you grown apart as far as your social lives/hobbies/etc. where you don't enjoy doing the same things together? I guess the optimist in me is wondering if you can fulfill your dreams WITH your wife.