Quote:
To be honest, she does almost all of the housework. However, she only works half time. We have two kids, she checks most of their homework, but things like math and science is my job. When the kids don't listen, I have to play the badguy and discipline them. I don't have a problem with that, I am just trying to show that I am not just lying around doing nothing at all.
I have a college degree and she barely passed high school. I am a professional (IT) and she is a sales clerk. I am not trying to put her or any sales clerk down, I am just trying to point out that because of my education I can and do earn enough that I pay more in taxes than she earns. Plus, I frequently publish technical articles and run a few web sites that bring additional income into the family. The fact that she can simply buy any new kitchen gadget she wants is a result of my income and the extra work I do. (She also got a new kitchen last year for $15K) My income goes into a joint account, her income goes into her person account and I end up paying all of the bills, even the insurance and registration on her car, her life insurance, her private retirement fund, and so forth.
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Doesn't matter how she did in high school; she's made a huge career sacrifice for the sake of the family. Quit calling it "your" money. Quit justifying the fact that you don't do your share around the house. She works part-time and does nearly all the house work? Are you aware housework is not an 8-5 job?
She isn't being fair to you, but I can tell you aren't fair to her just by the way you write. Either you split everything 50/50, or you don't. And you don't--you earn more so you think you contribute more.
There is no "generosity" in a marriage--what's mine is yours and what's yours in mine. She should not have her own $$$ in a different account unless you are entitled to a comparable sum.
Your post was a lot of money stuff and it's clear you don't see marriage as more than a financial transaction--she should give you sex and be nicer to you because "you earn the money." She doesn't see it that way at all--she knows she's made career sacrifices and does a lot more work than you, regardless of how much you earn. She knows you could not have both your job and family life without her--and you know it too. So why isn't it an equal partnership from your perspective? Why hasn't it always been? Do your share and quit expecting credit for it. Maybe she'll see that and develop some more respect for you when she sees you respect her and what she does.
