mrbubbles

thanks for the responses...

to answer your question draconis, both myself and wife always agreed that happiness doesnt necessarily mean happily ever after being with the same person in the same capacity forever... so if my wife decided that what would make her happy was to have another 'boyfriend' then we would talk about it... it doesnt mean i would be happy about it myself, but then again, who am i to deny my wife her happiness?

life is full of unexpected things. death. illness. life changes. so its very unrealistic to 'expect' to be with the same person living happily ever after forever even though its a wonderful ideal to look forward to.

i love my wife and always will. she is my soulmate, and as for the keeping secret part, i dont think its a secret or intend on keeping this a secret because its not in my character, its just a matter of timing... i think how and when you bring this topic up is very important.

and thats what i need advice on... the how and when...

i could call her up from across the world and leave it all up to her imagination what is going on or i can wait and speak to her face to face when i get back in another month. the dilemma is deciding on what to do... just tell both wife and gf right away or wait for the right time or maybe do something else...?

i thought maybe i could get a woman's perspective on how i should handle this... or maybe there is somebody here who has had a similar situation (feelings for two women/men) theyve had to deal with that i can learn from...

my heart is literally tearing apart here... how the hell did i let this happen? ah!