Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - How do you know when you have done all you can do?

hitrockbottom · 07-23-2008, 07:06 PM

Sounds like my situation in a way...roles reversed I am you and my wife is your husband.

Anyways the more I told my wife that I loved her and the more I tried to do things to "fix" the situation, and not the problem, it got worse. I went from not paying her attention to smothering her. Now I am walking a careful line until we are both comfortable with being interdependent with each other.

Meaning she isn't dependent on me but enjoys my help.

Sounds like your husband wants you around but is confused about something. Sex Life is an important thing to guys....3 days seems like 3weeks in our eyes. Intimacy is important as well, even though we dont say it. I'm talking the way you look at him, the way you focus on him, how you touch him, that sparkle you get when he shows up, the way you treat him around people. How are all these aspects?

My wife and I grew apart because we no longer shared interest. We were also more concerned with not upsetting the other person that we were not true to ourselves. Now we are working on that, even though she doesn't out and out admit it..

You need to be happy alone before you can be happy with him. He knows that. Maybe he feels like he has conquered you and there is nothing more for you to offer.

Take up a hobby, surprise him with something out of the ordinary, maybe have a teddy waiting for him when he walks through the door. Show him that you are independent...one thing at a time.

07-23-2008, 07:06 PM	#3 (permalink)
hitrockbottom Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 177	Re: How do you know when you have done all you can do? Sounds like my situation in a way...roles reversed I am you and my wife is your husband. Anyways the more I told my wife that I loved her and the more I tried to do things to "fix" the situation, and not the problem, it got worse. I went from not paying her attention to smothering her. Now I am walking a careful line until we are both comfortable with being interdependent with each other. Meaning she isn't dependent on me but enjoys my help. Sounds like your husband wants you around but is confused about something. Sex Life is an important thing to guys....3 days seems like 3weeks in our eyes. Intimacy is important as well, even though we dont say it. I'm talking the way you look at him, the way you focus on him, how you touch him, that sparkle you get when he shows up, the way you treat him around people. How are all these aspects? My wife and I grew apart because we no longer shared interest. We were also more concerned with not upsetting the other person that we were not true to ourselves. Now we are working on that, even though she doesn't out and out admit it.. You need to be happy alone before you can be happy with him. He knows that. Maybe he feels like he has conquered you and there is nothing more for you to offer. Take up a hobby, surprise him with something out of the ordinary, maybe have a teddy waiting for him when he walks through the door. Show him that you are independent...one thing at a time.