Kaine

ok i now know that she doe still love me and wants to work things out she called me aminute ago and invited me over for dinner.. 7/23/2008

know nobody has posted to my topic but after reading throuht the rest of the forums i can tell that there are alot of careing peaple that are on here alot and all the things that have been posted and all the life stories ive read since i signed up yesterday i know i will be a member for life and will keep updateing my storie so that maybe it will give others hope in there time of need. like so many of the other stories gave me.

one thing i would recommend to anybody is a book called ( his needs her needs ) it help't me better under staind what she was needing from me and i past it on to her she started reading it 3 days ago..

I am from a broken home my dad left when i was 14 leaveing my mom with all the bills and 3 kids to support so when i turned 15 i tested out of school and started working fulltime and have been working fulltime ever since with my current job i have been working up to 100hours a week so that did not leave hardly any time for my family or freinds and i lost site of what was inportant to me and was on the brink of looseing everything because of an addiction and the fact that i am a workaholic.. but right now i am looking for a job that leaves me more time for my family so i can show her how much i care and that is nothing in this world that could replace her in my life..
so i will post anything that will mite help others under staind.
that giving up is a choice and i made the choice not to give up and try harder by calling her just to talk and trying to talk about what on her mind and mine.
i now no that the hole cause of are problems was communication and that honesty is allways the best way.
i called her yesterday and w met at a park so we could talk and we did i sat there with her and told her every thing i had ever done ( she allreddy knew but i was not honest with her about it when it happend ) to her and the girlfriends before her and ask her to help me with my addiction and she was willing to help. she said that she was not mad at me for looking at porn she was mad because i lied about it and she does not see a problem with looking at porn but i still feel that for somee peaple it a sickness and i am one of those peaple. when i was looking at porn it did make me happy or feel good I felt ashamed and used for some resone. i ask her to help me and that's all I think i need is her support.
and about her affair (it was a one night staind while i was out of town for work )i know now that it can make a marriage stronger.. but have to talk about it and let her/him know how you feel without yelling or anything like that. when she told me i left the house and drove around for afew hours and thouht about it and when't home and she was not there she had gone to mothers house and was to ashamed to speak to me so i left her a letter and she called me an hour after i left and i have not left her side since that day untill now.
but you can not dwell on things in the past. and her having the abbility to come to me and tell me that. made me admire her honesty and my love for her grow even stronger we where only apart for 3days then and i have learned to fully trust her again and hope that she will be able to fully trust me in the future but i know it will take time. and I am going to have to stay strong and show her i can change..
and i want to move back home but she said she is not reddy for that yet but hopefully in time she will be

and any advice is welcome and i thank you for the help in advance.
these forums are full of other peaple that are haveing maital problems and i did not think that was hope for me untill i started reading.