This may get kind of long. So please bare with me. I'm 27 years old, my hubby is 32. We've been together for 10 years this September, and married for 8 of those. As with alot of relationships I'm sure, things have changed so much since we were first together. I still love him with all my heart and soul. I've been faithful to him and he to me as well. He has a bad, bad temper, he's never been physically abusive, but what I believe to be verbal abuse. Not as bad as other's I'm sure, but enough that it makes me a nervous wreck. He sais that it's me, that it's my fault that I can't handle arguing, I should be able to control my nerves and emotions. He can't stand it if I cry when we argue, most of the time I try not to cry, but I can't help it sometimes. I don't know what to do. I feel like I should not be complaining. I know that there are alot of worse situations that I could be in. I mean, he is a good man, he's just a butthole. He also sais that I would never find someone like him who doesn't do drugs, doesn't cheat, goes to work every day and be nice. The love is not a problem, I know he loves me and I love him. I have tried and tried and tried to talk to him about how his anger, the way he talks to me, the way he yells that I wish he would stop, try to change etc. But he refuses to even think that he has anger problems. I know that every couple argues, that is not the problem, I can argue and discuss things as long as he wants, it's when he starts yelling and screaming at me that my nerves go wacko and I just can't deal with that anymore. The names he calls me, is not what you would think, it's not bi***, or sl**, or wh***, or anything like that, but it is equally as demeaning. It's like dumb fu****, fu***** moron, things like that, and always with that F word. He does not think there is anything wrong with calling names, arguing, yelling and screaming does not bother him. Yet if I try to make my point, when he's done yelling, about whatever stupid thing we are arguing over, then it's shut the F up, I don't want to argue. So he's always getting it out of his system, and mine keeps building up. There are other issues, but this is the main one. I know the easy thing would be to say that if your not happy just get a divorce. I don't want to do that, he is a good hard working man. I just want him not to be so angry, and scream and yell and call me names all the time. I know that there is no easy answer, I guess mainly I was looking for a place to get this out. Thanks for listening and any advice would be apprecaited.
Sharon
