Something just hit me out of the blue yesterday: I would appreciate input about similar experiences from most anyone, and from anyone in the MC community, in particular.
During my early marriage to STBXW, she had me go to numerous sessions of MC, both with her and alone. The counselor that we were seeing was also her IC from quite a few years back and they always seemed to have a pretty good personal relationship, at least from my perspective. STBXW and I both tendered payment to this counselor whenever we went in, either as a pair, or individually.
Let's jump ahead. If you have taken the time to read my primary thread, STBXW announced in March, 2011, that I was to leave our well-to-do home and lifestyle in coincidence with my youngest son getting out of high school. Thinking it was a legitmate attempt at creating space for a latter reconciliation, I agreed. I also had quit going to counselling with her at the time of her request.
Flash forward, separation is still upon us some 18 months later with me living with sons in a neighboring city in another county some 25 miles from her. In November, 2011, STBXW files for D.
Then in February, 2012, she calls me making me think that R might be on the table~ ii wasn't.
My attorney recommends doing a check of STBXW's joint cell-phone records where we discover not only one affair, but two; all going on while I was both living in the home with her and separated.
Question: If STBXW, in any way, told our MC about any of this unilateral infidelity on her part, at any time of our sessions with them, then since this MC was working with both of us greatly under the guise of of keeping our marriage solvent(or so I had thought), shouldn't this marriage counselor, in some respect, have offered up any such confession to me, knowing that the resulting information would be more than detrimental to the livlihood of our marriage?
It's apparent that this counselor was an IC to my STBXW first, even before I ever entered the picture as her husband; then suddenly for 5 years, had fastly represented themselves as a willing MC to us both in both scheduled and unscheduled sessions.
To that end, and as a part of the MC process, wouldn't this counselor have had an ethical duty to report any confession of a sordid nature by the wayward spouse, to the betrayed spouse?
If so, wouldn't this be indicative of a gross violation of professional counseling ethics?
But if not, then at what point in time would a licensed counselor be able to arbitrarily go from being an IC to an MC, and vice-versa, without the proper notification of either party?
During my early marriage to STBXW, she had me go to numerous sessions of MC, both with her and alone. The counselor that we were seeing was also her IC from quite a few years back and they always seemed to have a pretty good personal relationship, at least from my perspective. STBXW and I both tendered payment to this counselor whenever we went in, either as a pair, or individually.
Let's jump ahead. If you have taken the time to read my primary thread, STBXW announced in March, 2011, that I was to leave our well-to-do home and lifestyle in coincidence with my youngest son getting out of high school. Thinking it was a legitmate attempt at creating space for a latter reconciliation, I agreed. I also had quit going to counselling with her at the time of her request.
Flash forward, separation is still upon us some 18 months later with me living with sons in a neighboring city in another county some 25 miles from her. In November, 2011, STBXW files for D.
Then in February, 2012, she calls me making me think that R might be on the table~ ii wasn't.
My attorney recommends doing a check of STBXW's joint cell-phone records where we discover not only one affair, but two; all going on while I was both living in the home with her and separated.
Question: If STBXW, in any way, told our MC about any of this unilateral infidelity on her part, at any time of our sessions with them, then since this MC was working with both of us greatly under the guise of of keeping our marriage solvent(or so I had thought), shouldn't this marriage counselor, in some respect, have offered up any such confession to me, knowing that the resulting information would be more than detrimental to the livlihood of our marriage?
It's apparent that this counselor was an IC to my STBXW first, even before I ever entered the picture as her husband; then suddenly for 5 years, had fastly represented themselves as a willing MC to us both in both scheduled and unscheduled sessions.
To that end, and as a part of the MC process, wouldn't this counselor have had an ethical duty to report any confession of a sordid nature by the wayward spouse, to the betrayed spouse?
If so, wouldn't this be indicative of a gross violation of professional counseling ethics?
But if not, then at what point in time would a licensed counselor be able to arbitrarily go from being an IC to an MC, and vice-versa, without the proper notification of either party?