Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - need help quickly
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Old 02-07-2010, 08:35 AM   #11 (permalink)
63Vino
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Default Re: need help quickly

Quote:
Originally Posted by sisters359 View Post
You are not in love with him--you even said yourself you fell quickly and then learned about him, and you don't even seem to like the person he is. You are in love with who you think he is and who you want him to be. No one could truly love someone who treats them so badly. You may also be in love with the idea of trying to "fix" him and make him the man you think he can be. That's a losing proposition.
Great description Sisters. I think this could describe many many relationships.

Don't be afraid to be on your own. You for sure, have great qualities and have a lot to offer as a person. You clearly demonstrated that. (not going into detail).

Trust yourself and your instincts. Dont let your fear (unfounded fear) keep you from doing what you need or know in your heart you need to do.

Sort it out. See a counselor. Rely on friends, thats what they're there for.

Note: the "See a counselor" part is about you, not about relationship. There is no reason i see to be obligated to a man who has everything (you) but gives little or nothing back, and hopefully, if you find the right trigger, you'll see that and have the courage and independance to do the right thing.

Most important you do the right things going forward. You dont want to repeat this right. Learn how to assess better what your getting into, seeing the signs, not falling in love with the "idea of him" but the "real him"

good luck!!
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