MarkTwain

Yes I have to put my hand up, with us men, it usually comes down to sex. What he is saying is that he felt you were not really "into him" sexually. By spontaneous he may mean that he wants you to initiate. This would prove to him that you find him attractive.

It may be in the past that he ran little tests on you. He would initiate sex most of the time, but occasionally he would wait, and see if you initiated.

Then I imagine after waiting for longer than he cared to, you did initiate, but he felt you were not doing it out of the thrill of desiring him but because your internal clock was saying, "I better sex him tonight, or he will be upset".

I don't know if this was the case, only you could know.

Men don't just want "mercy sex" - well not long term anyway. They are happy to initiate it 99% of the time if they fell that their loving is welcomed.

Of course he is being such a git at the moment, how could you fancy him? But love can carry you through. Stop talking about divorce, don't even raise the subject.

What you need now is to reach deep down inside you and bring out a miracle. Until then play for time.