lovemywife

wow , you hit the nail dead on the head there bud
I do have an underlying problem that I had no idea WAS an actual problem , I have severe social anxiety disorder , I've noticed this in the last few years , the thoughts of people looking at me like I'm different , or retarded because of the way I dress , or the way my headphones fit in my ears , I don't have any phsycal or mental dissability , so looking deeper to see if there is a root to this problem .. I beleive it is caused by the phsycal abuse I had witnessed as a young child . I have a fear of ppl in authority , I don't get along well with other males , where as women , I have no huge problem with , but still a fear .

internet is an escape , I can be myself and nobody can see me , so if they think I'm retarded who cares .. they donno who I am .

the sex , I think most of it stems from this disorder in that I have never in my life been told I suck .. so I guess it's kind of a safety net , I know I'm good and it's the only thing in the world I do that anyone outside of my relationship cannot comment on .

so there it is , and your absolutly right , I just never opened my eye's to it before last night .
now to find the proper help for this thing I got ..