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swedish · 08-07-2008, 09:55 AM

How long will he be in training? It's definitely harder to connect when you are not face to face and don't know how he's feeling, if he had a bad day, etc. so you do run the risk of him looking forward to talking to you (his relief at the end of a long day) and shutting down if the conversation goes south.

I definitely think it's important to talk through the things that bother you because if he keeps rejecting you and you stop talking you will eventually start to resent him and create distance in your marriage. It wouldn't be bad to evaluate what types of things bother you and choose your battles, so to speak. It's also important when communicating your concerns that you don't go in trying to win an argument but to really understand where he is coming from. I'm not sure what types of things bother you, so it's hard to understand where the issue lies in your conversations, but there are ways to communicate when the goal is to make your bond stronger. If you are looking for reassurance due to insecurities, I would put that in the category of needing to work on yourself because those types of conversations can wear a person down and cause resentment on the other end.

08-07-2008, 09:55 AM	#3 (permalink)
swedish Moderator Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Near Chicago Posts: 1,399	Re: Advice please How long will he be in training? It's definitely harder to connect when you are not face to face and don't know how he's feeling, if he had a bad day, etc. so you do run the risk of him looking forward to talking to you (his relief at the end of a long day) and shutting down if the conversation goes south. I definitely think it's important to talk through the things that bother you because if he keeps rejecting you and you stop talking you will eventually start to resent him and create distance in your marriage. It wouldn't be bad to evaluate what types of things bother you and choose your battles, so to speak. It's also important when communicating your concerns that you don't go in trying to win an argument but to really understand where he is coming from. I'm not sure what types of things bother you, so it's hard to understand where the issue lies in your conversations, but there are ways to communicate when the goal is to make your bond stronger. If you are looking for reassurance due to insecurities, I would put that in the category of needing to work on yourself because those types of conversations can wear a person down and cause resentment on the other end.