Hetfield

My wife loathes porn...either by both of us watching it or me watching it alone. Her ex-husband presented himself as this clean cut guy who lived "right". One day, while cleaning up in the basement, she came across a box filled with porn movies. She confronted him about it and he claimed it was his brothers. She asked the brother about it and he said they weren't his and "if they were mine, why would I store them in your basement?".

She became upset at that point and began to question her abilities in bed with him (most of the movies were newer than their wedding year so it was obvious he had been buying them after they were married). Slowly, information about this guy began to leak out...the fact he was abusive to his previous girlfriends, he was unfaithful, etc.

I think this experience soured her on porn and the good things that can come from a loving couple watching certain types of porn (not the trashy stuff). There are some very good erotic movies out there and she can't bring herself to watch those. She says it is hard for her to watch and that it does nothing to her watching other people have sex.

Personally, I've had a few ex-girlfriends who were into watching erotica (one actually loved it so much she had her own collection) and I don't see what the problem is provided it doesn't become a regular precursor to having sex. Once in awhile to keep things fresh and interesting is alright by me.

Unfortunately, it doesn't look like it will ever happen in my current marriage, though. Thanks to hubby #1 who more than likely ****ed it up.