Married for 6 months, 10 year relationship, my wife is pregnant with a 4 month baby. A couple of days back we had a big argument and I said I want a divorce, it was a silly thing to say since it came out of spite, never meant it. My wife now plans to give me what I asked for and she seems very serious about it.
To give a bit of a background, I'm on medication and side effects include dizziness and tiredness. I was outdoors already for 9 hours, wanted to get sleep and despite me suggesting otherwise, she arranged for something (for both of us). When the social obligation ended I was out for 12 hours in a row, no food for the whole day (can't eat at any time due to medication which must be taken with empty stomach). I said she doesn't consider me at all, that she makes all the decisions and it's like I'm not there, asked for a divorce, I was on an emotional roller coaster. She left the car, didn't reply any of my 10 calls and then I called her mother (mistake I know...) to say I can't take this any more and I'll be returning her car & I'll be flying back to the country where we live permanently soon (which may have to happen as I may need a surgery but didn't say it because of that), was somewhat calmer on the phone with my mother in law.
Next day I called to apologise for what I said. Too late, she won't pick up the phone most of the time and when she does she gives me 20 seconds, then she hangs up on me. She rarely replies to texts as well and will not see me.
A similar row had happened 2 more times (I mentioned divorce). One time it was due to her putting on sound proof headphones when I wanted to talk family financials (we overspend), the other time it was a trip where I had explicitly mentioned I'll need sleep which I didn't get as she wanted to go straight to the event (prior to the trip was sleeping 4-5 hours per day for 2 weeks due to work commitments). During the trip she was mad at me, I promised this would not happen again and ... I broke my promise a couple of days ago.
I apologise every day and ask her to talk to me. She says she doesn't trust me anymore and whatever I promise her is worthless. When I say I've been there for 10 years by her side, how can she not trust me, she says this all changed the last few months (which include the other two incidents).
I can't imagine life without my soon to be born baby and I love my wife very deeply.
Any advice on how to fix this would be really really valuable, I want to save my marriage and raise my child with her, I don't want to be the "other" parent and I'll do everything I can to prevent this from happening.
To give a bit of a background, I'm on medication and side effects include dizziness and tiredness. I was outdoors already for 9 hours, wanted to get sleep and despite me suggesting otherwise, she arranged for something (for both of us). When the social obligation ended I was out for 12 hours in a row, no food for the whole day (can't eat at any time due to medication which must be taken with empty stomach). I said she doesn't consider me at all, that she makes all the decisions and it's like I'm not there, asked for a divorce, I was on an emotional roller coaster. She left the car, didn't reply any of my 10 calls and then I called her mother (mistake I know...) to say I can't take this any more and I'll be returning her car & I'll be flying back to the country where we live permanently soon (which may have to happen as I may need a surgery but didn't say it because of that), was somewhat calmer on the phone with my mother in law.
Next day I called to apologise for what I said. Too late, she won't pick up the phone most of the time and when she does she gives me 20 seconds, then she hangs up on me. She rarely replies to texts as well and will not see me.
A similar row had happened 2 more times (I mentioned divorce). One time it was due to her putting on sound proof headphones when I wanted to talk family financials (we overspend), the other time it was a trip where I had explicitly mentioned I'll need sleep which I didn't get as she wanted to go straight to the event (prior to the trip was sleeping 4-5 hours per day for 2 weeks due to work commitments). During the trip she was mad at me, I promised this would not happen again and ... I broke my promise a couple of days ago.
I apologise every day and ask her to talk to me. She says she doesn't trust me anymore and whatever I promise her is worthless. When I say I've been there for 10 years by her side, how can she not trust me, she says this all changed the last few months (which include the other two incidents).
I can't imagine life without my soon to be born baby and I love my wife very deeply.
Any advice on how to fix this would be really really valuable, I want to save my marriage and raise my child with her, I don't want to be the "other" parent and I'll do everything I can to prevent this from happening.