| | Re: wife denies... i don't buy
1 - An emotional affair as deep as the one you describe between your wife and her friend is just as bad as many physical affairs. What's worse?: that she poured her heart and soul out to a stranger and committed her emotions to him for an extended period of time, behind your back. Or if she got a quicky once with a stranger because she was horny and regrets it. This is already as bad as it needs to be for her to help you, and she chooses not to. That's bull****.
2 - I've only been on here since Sept 2009, but I've already seen all of the patterns. One is they ONLY admit to what they've been caught with. Your wife is a little to intense with the "it was only emotional, we never touched" line for it to be believeable. She's too willing to give up that info to keep you off the physical track.
But she is NEVER going to admit to the physical part, if there even is one. NEVER. Get used to that or give her a polygraph. There's no in-between. The only way she is going to admit to the physical part is when you force her out the door with your accusations and she screams it at you as she's leaving with a suitcase.
Other that that, be strong. No groveling. No accusing. "You are the one that hurt our relationship, YOU need to be the one that comes to ME looking for help. As soon as you want to face this and work with me, I'll be sleeping in the den".
She is NEVER going to come clean. Change your strategy. Good luck