Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

sailorgirl · 06-12-2010, 05:16 PM

I think one of the things that makes me angry the most about this situation is that if I have an affair, all of a sudden I'm the bad guy. Poor hubby, his wife cheats on him and he is such a great guy...UGH. I think it is so very wrong of him to refuse me this way. And he does it so nicely.

We go to therapy and he will admit that lack of sex is painful for me, and that he should try to put more effort into having sex more frequently--but "more frequently" boils down to him not telling me "no" all the time. He still refuses to start any sexual advances. He has this "well I don't want it, you want it, so it should be entirely your responsibility" attitude about sex.

If I get angry and yell or fuss or cry about it, he thinks I'm being irrational. If I try to discuss this calmly I get nothing but logic--that is is wrong to force someone to change, he doesn't want it so he shouldn't have to go after it, most women don't like sex--maybe I should have that looked at..... He argues so well. I hate it.

06-12-2010, 05:16 PM	#10 (permalink)
sailorgirl Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 161	Re: sexless marriage I think one of the things that makes me angry the most about this situation is that if I have an affair, all of a sudden I'm the bad guy. Poor hubby, his wife cheats on him and he is such a great guy...UGH. I think it is so very wrong of him to refuse me this way. And he does it so nicely. We go to therapy and he will admit that lack of sex is painful for me, and that he should try to put more effort into having sex more frequently--but "more frequently" boils down to him not telling me "no" all the time. He still refuses to start any sexual advances. He has this "well I don't want it, you want it, so it should be entirely your responsibility" attitude about sex. If I get angry and yell or fuss or cry about it, he thinks I'm being irrational. If I try to discuss this calmly I get nothing but logic--that is is wrong to force someone to change, he doesn't want it so he shouldn't have to go after it, most women don't like sex--maybe I should have that looked at..... He argues so well. I hate it.