This is pure self delusion.
If your partner pretends attraction before marriage and after marriage says "you are a great partner" I simply have no desire for you, then they married you under false pretenses. That is abusive. It is no different than you quitting your job after marriage and saying "hey I never really liked working - but I really like hanging out with you - do you mind wearing all the financial stress?"
That said - your wife is not "obligated" to have sex. She is obligated to tell you what turns her on and off and then you at least have a shot at creating desire.
Thing is what a woman wants outside the bedroom - kindness, patience, unconditional love, etc. are exactly the things that when provided in full measure guarantee she will lose her desire for you.
By the way - if you think her love for YOU is unconditional, quit your job and tell her you have no plans to get another.
Only children deserve unconditional love. And even THAT needs to be tempered with real consequences for bad behavior.
Originally Posted by Nine-E
Deejo, is there a thread that explains this further? I am currently battling this very issue, and I'd like to hear more from you on this. Thanks.