Hey, I'm new here and from what I've read there seem to be a lot of people with good non-judgmental advice and some who have probably even gone through the same thing.
Me and my husband have been together for 6 years (married for 2 of those years), we have a little girl who will be turning 2 next month. It seems that the past 2 years we have been drawn further apart and become distant with each other. We were perfectly fine for 4 years but the problems started once we got married. We got married when I was pregnant so our whole marriage has been about raising a child. We have discussed the issue and my husband feels like he "still loves me but doesn't know if he's in-love with me anymore" , "doesn't know if we have a 'connection' anymore" , and doesn't even know if he "wants to make it work". He says that he's discouraged and not really feeling like we can work since all we did for 2 years was never spend much time together and argue over stupid things.
I am still in love with him and I desperately do want to make it work, I know how in love we were and I know that our love is not dead. I feel like what we went through in 2 years would be a lot for any newlywed couple to go through and that we can't just throw in the towel now that the hardest part is over with.
Since the day we got married, we dealt with me being pregnant, having the baby soon after, taking care of a newborn, he lost his job, we went through a really tough time where we could have lost our house and now we are finally on our feet again. He got a new job that is paying well and we are no longer struggling to pay bills and things seem to be settling to where we can actually afford to go out and spend time together. Literally for 2 years when we were struggling with money, all of our money was going towards bills and food, some bills would have to be late just so that we could afford to eat (and we do not eat out) so we never had money to spend on each other so we could spend time together.
We have talked a lot about this and he has agreed that he wants to make it work but he finds himself not wanting to spend time with me. He's worried that we're not a good match and don't have a 'connection' anymore. I say, we haven't spent enough time with each other for the past 2 years to say that it's completely gone, it's just hiding right now. We have decided to start "dating" again and are trying to find common hobbies that we can enjoy doing together. Does that seem we are on the right track? We are doing weekly date nights, playing soccer together, and running together. We still get our weekly guys and girls night so that makes 2 nights out of every week that we do not spend time together but the other nights we have decided to not close each other of like we had been and enjoy each others company.
and is it weird that since we started talking about these issues that our sex has gotten a lot better, and much more frequently? haha
Also, we are very young, I am 21 and he is 25. Any advice, comments are highly needed. Thank you so much and so sorry for making this so long
