Re: It's a VERY fresh wound and it HURTS
If I do leave, I will wait about a month to make that decision. I want to get through the holidays and the birth.
That's a solid plan; gives you a chance to think things over and judge his remorse. It's important that he understands what it feels like - to not know if he will lose his wife for cheating on her. Don't commit to stay for now.
One other thing you have to insist on if you want to consider R. Either she leaves that job or he does. Period. There can be absolutely no contact. If that doesn't happen, he's made the decision for you.
Sorry you're here.