Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Need a woman's input on an unemployed husband

quirky_girl · 08-07-2010, 09:42 AM

When my husband got laid off last summer, I had a similar reaction to your wife's. I was so scared that we would end up homeless if we couldn't pay our rent that I went out and took on a second job. I became resentful of him because I felt our financial burdens were on my shoulders and I could not see him actively trying to change that.

I think that you truly care for your family since you were willing to take on the custodian job, take the job but keep job hunting for something better. And keep an open conversation with your wife about your job hunt. She may not be around when you are applying or see how much you are doing. This would make her think you are not trying. At the end of the day after you have been job hunting, talk to her about what you did. This will build her confidence in you back and she won't just see this situation as a downward spiral. Women tend to want to fix things right away, and a job hunt is a long process. Keep her involved and she will not feel a need to email you endless craigslist postings.

Best of wishes for a happy marriage and wonderful new job!

08-07-2010, 09:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
quirky_girl Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 73	Re: Need a woman's input on an unemployed husband When my husband got laid off last summer, I had a similar reaction to your wife's. I was so scared that we would end up homeless if we couldn't pay our rent that I went out and took on a second job. I became resentful of him because I felt our financial burdens were on my shoulders and I could not see him actively trying to change that. I think that you truly care for your family since you were willing to take on the custodian job, take the job but keep job hunting for something better. And keep an open conversation with your wife about your job hunt. She may not be around when you are applying or see how much you are doing. This would make her think you are not trying. At the end of the day after you have been job hunting, talk to her about what you did. This will build her confidence in you back and she won't just see this situation as a downward spiral. Women tend to want to fix things right away, and a job hunt is a long process. Keep her involved and she will not feel a need to email you endless craigslist postings. Best of wishes for a happy marriage and wonderful new job!