Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test
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post #2 of (permalink) Old 03-01-2017, 11:01 AM
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 138
Originally Posted by FortheRecord View Post
Good day all

I'm reaching out here because, frankly, I don't know where/who/how to ask this question.

I have been very happily married to my high school sweetheart for almost 25 years. We were together for over 4 years before we got married.
We were both virgins when we first slept together and I have been entirely faithful to her. I believe she has been entirely faithful to me.

Yesterday she had a procedure to check an abnormal result that appeared in her annual exam a week ago. She had an abnormal result a couple of years ago, went through this, and no viral or other activity was detected. Yesterday, however, they noted that they found evidence of HPV-39 HPV-51.
She called and explained it to me, I did some research and then left work so we could talk. Aside from the obvious worry about her health, we also had to consider that in some way, what her doctor causally classified as a STD had entered our marriage.

A week ago, I had the perfect marriage. we have had our struggles in the past but always worked through them. In the past I wasn't always the best husband. I worked far too many hours and was so concerned with providing that I sometimes forgot how important my other roles were as husband, father, friend, companion, etc... We worked through those issues and for the last 8+ years we have been great trending better. During that period however, I often wondered/worried if I was worthy of my wife and there was a seed of doubt regarding her faithfulness which we also talked through at great length.

I've done additional research now and I've discovered that this could be a false positive, that there's no FDA approved test for me to take for verification, that one or both of us could have inherited HPV from our mothers and that horizontal transmission is possible though highly unlikely and unproven.

So, I'm trying to process this. First and foremost, I want/need/pray that my wife is healthy and that the abnormal cells are nothing to be concerned about.
But in the back of my mind that seed of doubt has returned and I'm not sure what to do about it. I can't really talk to anyone about this because we have all the same friends and I would never cast any doubt on my wife. So I respectfully turn to an anonymous forum for council.

Thanks in advance for any responses.

Did either of you have any sexual contact at all before marriage? It's sexually transmitted but I read you can get it from foreplay as well. It can also stay dormant in your body for years.
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