Re: red flags everywhere or am I crazy?
One thing I've learned is that your "gut" is likely the best infidelity detector at your disposal. It won't tell you the who, what, where and how many, but it will tell you when something is "off" in your M ... TRUST YOUR GUT!!!
Look, your "gut" bothered you to the point that you went online looking for infidelity help, which led you here. That's not just your gut feeling off, its telling you something is so wrong it has prompted you to take action. Others will be around with more snooping advice, but I wanted to let you know ... whatever you do, don't let your W gaslight you into believing that you're the crazy one for questioning her integrity and virtue.
You are right, there are red flags waving everywhere ... a guy known for sexual harassment has been sniffing around your W for years now, even after they quit working together, and you have caught her in LIE after LIE about their relationship. There no longer is any valid reason for them to be in contact, but they still are, even after you have expressed your concerns. Those few facts by themselves are enough to put most of the BH's here on high alert to investigate further.
Brace yourself for the ****storm that you are likely to experience as you start peeling the layers off this onion.