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morning after charity sex

6K views 35 replies 26 participants last post by  aine 
#1 ·
ok wives, if you give it up the night before out of obligation and not real desire, do you want a thank you the next morning? an apology?
 
#3 ·
There has been many a morning where we just continue from the night before.
Usually followed by her making coffee and me going out to get bagels.
And, if we aren't going in to work that day, "Wake and bake"
 
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#4 ·
Does she hate sex?

Does she hate you?

Did she do something spectacular and totally fantastic?

Did she provide pity sex even though it caused her great pain?

G, are you still trying to find the right combination of tricks to get her to happily have sex with you?

Personally, I expect a thank you as soon as sight returns to his eyes when I go above and beyond. Followed by a sincere apology that he remains unworthy... ;)
 
#6 ·
I would never have sex out of obligation, so cannot answer your question.

I think that the reason you are asking this question if far more important than any answer to your question anyone on this forum could give you.
 
#8 · (Edited)
I do not know what you would call it, but my ex fiancee cheated on me when I was in combat for a year. We broke up 6 months before I came home and she let me stay with her for two weeks, and mostly had sex. She felt that she owed me that and I was horny as heck after a year with no women so I accepted her offer. I always thanked her even though she cheated on me and I took the engagement ring back. I have always felt that when a woman shares her body with me, it is a trust and a gift. I always thanked her, as I continue to do with my wife. I have even been thanked by a few women myself. :)
 
#9 ·
Years of obligatory Saturday AM sex has got me down, might as well set an alarm. No apology necessary, no eye contact either, its awful.

I remember one hand job in particular she was watching TV not even paying attention then she asks me
"Oh did you cum"? BAwhahaha yep its that bad.
 
#19 ·
Oh my, this image makes me so sad for you!

In all fairness, do you "do" things for her in which you have one eye on the hockey game? As a woman, that's ****ing frustrating. It doesn't even have to be sexual... My husband has this annoying habit of doing things to "please" me when it's clear he doesn't want to do them. His attention will be scattered. Then stay at home and I'll do it my damn self.

Sometimes, the same thing goes for us and sex. At least she gave you a hand job...
 
#12 ·
I alway thank a woman no matter what the circumstances. I am old fashioned that way. When someone is willing to show me their naked body and allow me to penetrate them, it is a special gift and I am thankful for it.
 
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#16 ·
Bad sex is not worth the time. I would offer to teach or show the woman how to do things within a night or two if they are inexperienced (going downtown on them) and if there is no improvement - buh bye.

But yeah, even a particularly bad sex partner - I decided to FAKE it. I had to think of sex with past women to keep things "up" - then went into fake climax mode because even that wasn't working. I thanked her... she went away happy - no reason to hurt her feelings. It was always going to be an ONS thing. If it was a relationship woman, then I wouldn't have done that.
 
#17 ·
I always thank my husband when I'm the pursuer.

He thanks me by cuddling me tightly while spooning, as he falls asleep.

I don't do obligation sex, although sure, I have days when my mind is preoccupied on other things. I try to re-focus on what's important.
 
#21 ·
I didn't thank women.

But I always told them how wonderful they were, how beautiful they were, and how fantastically lucky I was to get the chance to have sex with them.

Always, and often.
Just shows "different strokes for different folks". I did that for my wife. She felt it was a sign of weakness and lost respect for me. So did another woman I dated a few of times. Not every woman likes being complimented effusively. That is OK, there are plenty of non-communicative men out there for those women.
 
#23 ·
My wife said; when said from a position of power compliments are received as genuine, and cannot possibly demean the man giving them.

I am merely the messenger of her message. I suspect her message means she believes who is delivering the compliment matters a great deal.

I have never had any issue with a woman perceiving me as weak, or loosing respect for me.

Be well
 
#29 ·
I cannot help but think that the act of sex or "obligatory" sexual acts that are used as a "commodity," a "reward", or is done primarily out of sheer convenience, between either of two otherwise loving partners, that is indicative of "bartering," can in effect be, a rather unhealthy situation!

But then again, maybe that's just me!
 
#32 ·
Without any other knowledge of your life, I can tell from this one post that your marriage lacks real love, respect, cherishing, honoring and has more than it's fair share of bitterness, resentment and frustration.

The sex in your marriage would be down a ways on the list of problems to deal with.

Your sex life could simply be a victim of the larger issues in your marriage.

Given the environment that is fairly evident from your post,

I would not want to have sex with your wife and, if I were her, I wouldn't want it with you either.

You might be going a little nuts do to a frustrating sex life, and I sympathize, but your marriage seems to have some terminal problems that sex by itself will not help.
 
#36 ·
I wouldn't have sex out of obligation, I may not be in the mood, but my H would sort that out pretty quick if he was in the mood.
No 'thank yous' or 'apologies'??, we are in it together, no need for those.
We may make some comments such as 'that was awesome' or such like if it was a particularly spectacular session. :D
 
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