Hello lovely forum peeps. This is my first post, though I have been reading the awesome advice on here for some time now. I was hoping to call on that advice now.
So... I enjoy sex 3 or 4 times a week but find it repugnant when my husband has been drinking. I hate the smell of alcohol on his breath and it is a deal breaker for me for physical intimacy.
I have told him this and it feels like he's making the choice between beer and sex at the moment which makes me feel rejected. This can result in only one time per week which isn't enough and leaves me frustrated and cross.
Some of you might suggest me having a drink with him to offset the smell but I have to get up super early for work and even 1 drink makes me feel horrid in the morning. I have had a drink on a work night before now because I'd like to be intimate with him but I always regret it.
I bath and shave my legs every night, put on a nice dress. I even bought erotic underwear recently and wear that under my dress so it's clear I'd like to get it on. I thought this would entice him away from the fridge and towards me but it's not working!
It's getting to the point where I'll spend the evening feeing anger as soon as he opens the first can which ruins our evening together. I've just been deciding to go to bed earlier than normal to avoid this situation.
So I'd like to tap into your collective wisdom about these questions:
1. Am I being mean for thinking/ feeling this way?
2. Do you think he is drinking to deliberately not have sex with me?
3. How can I get him not to drink so we can be intimate instead?
4. Any other suggestions or advice appreciated!
So... I enjoy sex 3 or 4 times a week but find it repugnant when my husband has been drinking. I hate the smell of alcohol on his breath and it is a deal breaker for me for physical intimacy.
I have told him this and it feels like he's making the choice between beer and sex at the moment which makes me feel rejected. This can result in only one time per week which isn't enough and leaves me frustrated and cross.
Some of you might suggest me having a drink with him to offset the smell but I have to get up super early for work and even 1 drink makes me feel horrid in the morning. I have had a drink on a work night before now because I'd like to be intimate with him but I always regret it.
I bath and shave my legs every night, put on a nice dress. I even bought erotic underwear recently and wear that under my dress so it's clear I'd like to get it on. I thought this would entice him away from the fridge and towards me but it's not working!
It's getting to the point where I'll spend the evening feeing anger as soon as he opens the first can which ruins our evening together. I've just been deciding to go to bed earlier than normal to avoid this situation.
So I'd like to tap into your collective wisdom about these questions:
1. Am I being mean for thinking/ feeling this way?
2. Do you think he is drinking to deliberately not have sex with me?
3. How can I get him not to drink so we can be intimate instead?
4. Any other suggestions or advice appreciated!