Re: Planning holidays, dates etc
It is just the opposite in our marriage. Our situation: married 12 years, kids 6 months, 16 months, 3 years. I'm a SAHM, my H travels a LOT. He makes plans all the time while he is away, gets home and his way of "discussing" is telling me "I figured we would do this, this, and this: you game?" He does not realize what it takes to haul around 3 kids that need nursing, diaper changes and naps. He just wants to be with his kids when he is home, visit family and friends and generally get out of the house.
He takes it in stride when an outing turns out to be a disaster. I have told him if he would just text me I can look into what he wants to do and plan things. He says ok but never does. I have just learned to go with the flow.
Aine I'm not on TAM too often (I got kids!) so I'm not familiar with your story but wondering if it's other stuff too and his not planning just adds to It? Because I guess from your OP I wouldn't conclude that you are not a priority especially if he is willing to go along with your plans. Maybe there's just certain stuff he likes to plan?