fire_vogel

when i take a stand vs my husband and try to make him see things from where i stand - instead of me constantly having to see things from where he stands - it completely backfires on me in the sense that he stops giving emotionally, becomes distant and sometimes, even mean.
like i said somewhere before, i've endured quite a lot emotionally lately, but specially two situations, one of which i am not ready to talk about just yet and the other being the loss of my Uncle about 3 weeks back, a man who was like a father to me. and given that there's this feud between my family and my husband's family, i also feel that he isn't being able to sympathise with me (in relation to my Uncle's passing away) the way i would like him to.

when my family would make attacks on my husband's character and stuff, i would stop them right there and tell them not to say a single word against my husband. and they would stop. they realised that i wasn't going to allow them to sling any mud at him. and now, i compromise and would rather that my husband have nothing to do with my family than have them curse or insult him or things like that and treat him in a way he simply doesn't deserve.
but on the other hand, my husband expects me to interact with his side of the family and deal with all the crap they throw at me (coz anyway, he doesn't see it for what it really is...). sometimes it's like he's telling me that it's all just in my head. it drives me nuts when he reacts like that. like i'm crazy and am just making up stories to drive rifts between himself and his family.

somewhere down the line, i feel like my emotional health is really going way downhill and i'm tired of compromising, understanding, giving and trying.
sometimes i wish that of all the things he does for me materially speaking, if he could just shift from that a bit and invest into the emotional side of things too and balance it all out, i'd finally feel at peace.

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