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Old 09-26-2010, 04:31 PM   #8 (permalink)
SmallRose
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 9
Default Re: Need Advice on saving my marriage

Thank you so much for your response, I guess I dont really have many hobbies just for me, I'm a stay at home mom so all of my days are spent with my daughter but i do have some interests in yoga/pilates and if my weekend job picks up (it's dead right now lol) then maybe i can afford to take actual classes and not just do them at home. We do have weekly guys night/girls night, mine is on tuesday and his is on wednesday but that has just become very routine lol I do need to take some time out for me, i dont, im not much of a "me time" kind of person.

He has not started counseling since we do not have much money to spend apart from bills but we have agreed that this is something that we will definitely be investing soon (this month or the next), but it will just be him. I have never had any counseling, im a very happy, open, honest person and i love to talk, never really felt the need to talk to anyone else because i've always been able to speak to him about everything (not so much now since he's still sort of withdrawn).

We do some weekend activities by going to see my brother's band perform, dinner (not often bc of money) and just random things. Now that football has started it has taken over our weekends and we usually go to a friends house to watch with our mutual friends. Im not a football fan but going out and spending time in the environment is fun, he doesn't really spend a whole lot of time with me since he is really into the game, i kind of just mingle with friends while we are there. Yesterday was his birthday and we went to a football game (a birthday present from his parents) and it was a lot of fun, even though i dont like the sport, i was excited and supportive because i really wanted him to have a good time and i really wanted him to see that we can still have fun together (one of his complaints was that he finds that he never really wants to spend time with me), we ended up having a lot of fun and over all a good day. Although it did bother me that he really didn't want to hold my hand bc it was "too hot for that" (yes, it was about 94 degrees but i sometimes feels like he always has an excuse to not show affection).

Even though we have been having some fun when we do spend time together, it's so hard to read him bc he shows no signs of anything! No affection or anything....it's so hard. I dont know if he is having fun with ME or if he's just having fun because whatever activity we are doing is fun, you know?
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