Originally Posted by SimplyAmorous
This is the problem, your man has HURT you, he has degraded you, he has associated dirtiness with most women.
Not all men are like this and not all women are like that!
And Yes, most married men WANT, CRAVE, DESIRE the adventerous woman in bed. Your husband has stunted that within you by his previous words, they sting and now you fear to live out your fantasies with him. Boy is he ever an A-****.
You are right in NEEDING to feel totally ACCEPTED for who you are , what you can bring to the bedroom, and what you can unleash on him.
Totally normal to have such fantasies, the higher the sex drive, the more the fantasy life generally. Good girls, even virgins have such fantasies. You are so normal, nothing to be ashamed of at all.
I should say he never said any of these things to me directly but when there is some scandal involving woman he says nasty things. For instance, Do you remember the Kendra Wilkerson Sp? tapes released by her exbf.
I was livid that he released a private tape of sex with him, a man she loved and never expecting that it would be released. My husband, on the other hand , was critical of her for making the tape he felt she deserved to be exposed because she should have been smart enough not to make it. He didn't think the bf was scum and jealous of her success.
This from a man who want me to be a freak in bed. If I told him my fantasies I thinks he would think I was possessed. Although I am certain that he would love to do every one but could not accept that I came up with them.
I brought a vibrator in Jan and had my first orgasm!!. Boy was that wonderful now I know why people crave sex so much. I started to message my anus when I felt it contracting when I had an orgasm. It feels so good. I know this is TMI but I am so excited. I can't tell anyone else so forums are my outlet. I have learned so much since Jan.
My husband would probably bet his life that I don't think about sex but I do all of the time.