Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Fantasies and fear of the loss of respect

Mal74 · 11-18-2010, 08:43 AM

Thanks. This is pretty much exactly what I tell him - the fact that he puts this kind of trust in me is pretty awesome. I guess the truest answer of all is that there is no sharing without risk, and it's the willingness to share despite the risk that is the measure of courage. I respect his courage. To me he is a lionheart.

I understand his concern though because some of the fantasies he's shared with me involve being belittled or denigrated in some way. I don't get a charge out of this, and I wonder if his concern stems from that. We've talked about it a little and I think this is it. I don't sense it's a huge worry for him.

In the back of my mind I guess I do wonder how far I could go in providing this sort of stimulation before I started internalizing it in some fashion. Have any of you had this experience, where the lines of fantasy & reality become blurred or one really begins to influence the other?

11-18-2010, 08:43 AM	#4 (permalink)
Mal74 Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 162	Re: Fantasies and fear of the loss of respect Thanks. This is pretty much exactly what I tell him - the fact that he puts this kind of trust in me is pretty awesome. I guess the truest answer of all is that there is no sharing without risk, and it's the willingness to share despite the risk that is the measure of courage. I respect his courage. To me he is a lionheart. I understand his concern though because some of the fantasies he's shared with me involve being belittled or denigrated in some way. I don't get a charge out of this, and I wonder if his concern stems from that. We've talked about it a little and I think this is it. I don't sense it's a huge worry for him. In the back of my mind I guess I do wonder how far I could go in providing this sort of stimulation before I started internalizing it in some fashion. Have any of you had this experience, where the lines of fantasy & reality become blurred or one really begins to influence the other?