Quote:
Originally Posted by VONSTER
Fire Vogel, you are not harsh at all!!! I was hoping for a womans prespective. This chat room helps a lot you guys are great. I kind of think of my wife as a bank vault and Ive taken too many withdrawls without deposits. My wife has done a lot for me but how do I give back to her? How do I reassure her?
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vonster, am glad to see that you took my words positively and are trying to move forward and find solutions.
well, what i would like my husband to do to make me feel better, the 'deposits' i need from him, would be signs to show me that he trusts me. i would like to see and hear as well that he trusts me and believes in the love i have for him, that he knows he can have faith in this love we share.
so do that for her, show her that you trust her and that you have faith in this relationship. be POSITIVE, have a POSITIVE OUTLOOK on life in general, but specially on the future of your love. but don't neglect the present.
you love her, you want her and need her, SHOW HER THESE THINGS.
little signs of love: you can offer gifts, but to be honest, a single flower does it for me. it just makes me feel totally cherished. sweet notes, along with the flowers or separately... text her from time to time, just to let her know you're thinking of her or that you find her beautiful and things like that.
spend QUALITY TIME WITH HER. take her out on dates (i know you can't do that often, but try to do it once in a while).
reaffirm the position you have as the man of the relationship, give her the support she needs emotionally. a relationship is something a person can't pull off alone, like i said, it takes TWO to make it work.
when spending time with her, communicate with each other. talk to her, but get HER to talk TO YOU. LISTEN to her, give her understanding. LISTENING... it does so much wonders. if she feels LISTENED by YOU, and eventually UNDERSTOOD as well (so you'll really have to listen), she'll feel safe and will be in a better and more receptive position towards you and your relationship.
so stand up, stand tall, BE THERE FOR HER and let her know that you ARE there FOR HER.