| | Re: Indifferent, confused, feeling stupid
I am so glad that you're working on YOU. It all boils down to YOU anyway. You're starting to remember the wonderful woman you were. ARE.
After my marriage ended, I felt much the same as you do. I NEVER even WANTED another relationship again. I was fine where I was at in life. If I'd been alone the rest of my life, I KNOW I'd have been just fine. I was happy. I enjoyed my own company. I enjoyed my life. I dated..and that's all it ever was...just a date. The old fashioned kind of dating. It was just an evening of enjoying the company of the opposite sex. I did things with my girlfriends. I really, TRULY was enjoying my life. The last thing I wanted was a man to "take care of".
I was 45 years old with 4 kids (2 still at home, though one was getting close to getting on his own) and health issues. I don't make a ton of money. I came with my own baggage, biases and issues. I didn't look so good on "paper". My SO entered my life and changed all that. Simply put..my life is better for having him in it. He happens to be 10 years younger than myself, and I almost missed out on him b/c of the age difference. I didn't "do" younger men. This one was different, though..and I haven't regretted one second of my time or life with him.
You WILL heal from this relationship. You'll go forward and apply the lessons learned from living with this kind of man. Your inner "radar" will likely leave you sensitive towards spotting another one.
Please believe me when I tell you that when you TRUST YOURSELF, you'll be able to trust another man. It starts with YOU.
The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them. ***Maya Angelou
"But it's only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve" ***Professor Barnhardt to Klaatu