| | Re: Seeking any advice that might turn things around
Sisters359, yes that is sort of what I meant. I think my wife would tell you that she understands she neglected me for a long time, but now she's back and if we can just get over the past, we'd be fine. That's easy for her to say, of course. She has said she would get another therapist, but that was 5 weeks ago. I've given up pushing on this point.
I do not think my biggest concern is lack of sex (though it's up there), but rather just passion and priority for the relationship. For example, she had a holiday party for her work the other day...told me for 3 days she didn't want to go, but had to. The day of the party, I was having a very difficult time with things and for the first time in our marriage, I point blank asked her to stay home with me. I was having a rough go of it that day and all the intruders to the marriage were bugging me. I promised we could spend the night in bed reading, watching tv, whatever she wanted... I just needed her home. Her response was to stay out until 11:30p at the party and be upset that I made her make a choice.
I think she is more available to the idea of sex than usual now but it's fake. How could it not be? You spend 5 years making intimacy with your husband your lowest priority and now all of a sudden, it's something you like to do? No thanks.
I will keep trying. Sometimes she says something that is very encouraging, and I'll get a huge surge of hope... and then in the very next sentence she'll be talking about doing dishes and cleaning the kids clothes and I'll never anything more of it. It is very frustrating.