Originally Posted by Conrad
I've found some success at deploying the shadow in support of what I wish to be.
Sounds convoluted, but I can give a concise summary.
If you are trying to "prove something" to someone else - and you realize that your detractors "will be right/have the last laugh" if you fail, a competitive shadow persona can become your best friend.
It brings strength to the conviction not to be beaten. And, everyone ends up winning.
I hope that's clear.
Conrad, I’m not sure if I’ve understood you.
If I win and somebody else loses, especially those closest to me, then I consider I too have “lost”. If I “lose” and somebody else wins, then obviously I’ve lost.
So I don’t go for win/lose or lose/win. I always go for win/win as I see the other two options as a “no win”, for me.
Sometimes it’s exceedingly hard to get to that win/win situation and the path towards it can be had only at great personal sacrifice. But sometimes the sacrifice is way too much so I declare a “no win” situation. Even at times an “Let’s agree to disagree and move on” quite simply doesn’t work.