anonymom

Thank you all for your advice. Thank you major misfit for that beautiful poem.
We do go out as a family and I appreciate it, but it's usually things that interests him.
If we do something that I want to, he'll sulk and complain pretty much through it all.
So it like, defeats the whole purpose. Just last weekend I told him that I'd like an entire
day to go out, his response "then get an effing job so that you can go out whenever you want!"
I even told him that I just want to end this and leave, of course that's when he started
talking about him changing and maybe we should go to MC. It was weird because he'd kind of
beg me to stay and if I was refusing he'd lash out with very mean insults

So I guess I have no rights to time alone, feelings, or being sick unless I bring in money.
When he says this, it makes me feel that I have no human rights unless I bring in money.
The times I do get to go out (I'm in some meetup groups), I'll get back and he'll be very
cold and distant to me. As if I just came back from doing bad things. I just hate feeling
like he's my dad instead of my husband. I told him that I do not need his permission
to go out, and of course, if I have a job or move out then yeah I don't.

I don't know. I can't tell him anything without it being turned around on me. My feelings
are always over exaggerated and they are wrong if it's anything against him. I don't know
if I want to be with him anymore. I feel like the love is going out of me. Maybe MC is what
we need, but I won't be surprised if he feels the counselor is wrong, 'cause you know
my husband is perfect and does nothing wrong...