Originally Posted by nice777guy
Have you discussed the concept of "trickle truth" with her? Explain that hearing something new every day makes you dread what you'll find out tomorrow, and next week, and next month, etc.,
Try telling her that you would rather have the band-aid ripped off all at once. Ask her if you can set aside some time in the evening or on a weekend where she can come clean with any info she thinks might be important, and where she will agree to answer any and all questions from you.
Explain that this will help you BOTH begin to get past things quicker if everything is out on the table.
In not so many words I kind of did that already. She at first will tell me she does not remember anything more. Then I find out or she lets it slip and says she did not want me to find out and pull away/give her the cold treatment. I am hoping tonight, or even over the phone while she is on break from work (that way I have time to calm down, and thank her later). I know over the phone is not the best, but i figured it would be better then her seeing my face if I find out something dreadful.