| | Re: I fell in love and married two different people
I hate to say this, and hate to use my own daughter as an example - but she might be bipolar and you are in for a rough, long ride.
My daughter was bright, smart, funny and independent when she married her husband 4 years ago. During that four years she threw fits (sometimes violent), become an alcoholic, did exactly what she wanted when she wanted, spent money as if there was an unlimited supply and refused to work--alcohol and her "cats" became her #1 priority. Her husband, I, her father, grandmother, brother - NO ONE could talk any sense into her and get her to see what she was doing to her life and those around her (there was a 6-year age gap - she was younger). Fast forward - she was diagnosed with bi-polar last year. Wouldn't take her meds regularly, still unbalanced and still drinking - almost torpedoed her husband's military career before it even got off the ground.
As of today, she sits in jail where she has been since the 7th of January when she threatened her husband, hit a cop and then hit a nurse while she was being booked into jail. She is awaiting trial on 3 felony charges and will sit in jail until her trial. Her husband has filed for divorce and it will be final next month.
NOW - she has discovered that guess what - she needs to take her meds daily, she has to quit drinking (no choice now, can't drink in jail) and she NOW wants to turn things around - too bad she didn't make that choice before she ended up in jail.
So the moral of the story being - she just might be bi-polar as it is a genetic and hereditary condition, and, if she is - things will get much worse. She won't admit it, won't think she has to take meds, won't go to counselling and won't do what's necessary to keep her on an even keel. She'll have manic and depressive episodes.
Don't wait 4 years until it almost destroys you. Have her see a psychiatrist, if she won't, then run-run-run as fast as you can. Unfortunately, if she is bi-polar and not diagnosed, your life will become a living hell.
I'm telling you this as a mother of a bi-polar daughter whom I love dearly. I feel sorry for my soon to be ex-SIL and wished he would have bailed sooner - he had a miserable four years.
Do some research and think very "seriously" before you take on this issue, if she is, in fact - mentally unstable and possibly bi-polar, you will save yourself a lot of future heartache.
"Don't Find Fault - Find A Remedy" Henry Ford