libra23

Wats:
the most important thing i can tell you is don't give up. my husband and i were in the exact same situation as you. i wanted to leave him. refused counseling...all of it. i moved out for awhile even. my husband refused to give up on me, on us, on our marriage. i moved back home recently and we are attending marriage counseling. i am beginning to feel good about us again. but its a long slow process.

i can't stress enough communication. if you can get your wife to discuss with you some of the things she is unhappy with (not just what u think you've done wrong) you can begin to work on those. show her in little ways u love her. dont' expect her to let you know that she is noticing. i saw my husband changing but it took me a long time to admit that it WAS making a difference. just doing little things makes a huge difference. he leaves me little notes saying have a good day and that he loves me. it all makes a difference. i know my husband wants to be a better man. it makes me want to be a better person as well...and also made me realize that we could have the things we wanted, we could dream, plan our future...and be happy together. communication is so huge. i would have never thought my huband and i were bad at it...turns out...we were awful.

its hard. i feel i was extremely depressed and still am a little. i was so unhappy with everything. if she is refusing counseling...maybe encourage her to see someone on her own. you have to understand...you can't make her happy. she has to be happy with herself first.

i could go on forever. feel free to ask me questions...like i said our situations are the same. let me leave u with this. if you truely love her...fight for her. fight for your marriage. don't give up.

libra23